Maiden to mother

Motherhood does not simply land on the woman once pregnant, once in labor, or once she’s given birth.

Itself is a labor, the surrender required to ripen and release your child out of your body is the same, perhaps more intense surrender offering itself to you throughout your child’s development.

You too are growing, changing, and learning. And yielding to the burn, the difficulty, the exhaustion, frustration, and irritation, it is all birthing YOU this time.

Your first labor was perhaps the morning sickness, the achy body, the growing tummy, the shifting season. Then the labor of birthing your child into this world. And now the longest labor— your whole life. This labor’s only promise is change and sweetness. It will push you. It will break you down. But you will do it, nonetheless. You’ll do it gleefully and very rarely effortlessly, but mostly you’ll do it because it’s what must be done. It will feel sticky, messy, not planned enough, not good enough, too slow, too busy, too overwhelming, and too simple.

This labor needs nourishing like never before. It’s at times quiet, like hearing the children in the room next door, always thinking through the next thing. 

And it will need your presence. That connection between you and baby is what makes the surges of difficulty so tender. So worth it. Stay present.

And almost undoubtedly you’ll encounter the moment of giving up: I don’t want this. How did I choose this? Who am I? I want to run. I want to escape this. These are the moments you must run to the ear that will listen. In this moment you’ll need to be held, mothered, and nurtured. 

You give so much. Don’t feel guilty for needing things. Needing words, needing people. They are for you. This is a labor of a lifetime, and you were made for it. Made to mother.

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